Wednesday, December 2, 2015

Batman v Superman - Official Trailer 2 Review

In one word: demoralizing.



The new Batman v Superman trailer dropped tonight and I've got to say I was pretty underwhelmed. Stop watching this trailer at 2:06 because the creators of this trailer went to the same school of spoilers as the people that made the trailer for the last Terminator movie.




For the record, I was totally locked into this trailer until 2:06. I thought it looked tense as all else, and seeing Clark Kent meet Bruce Wayne was simply awesome. I was getting more and more excited and then 2:06 happened. Before I start the spoiler section, I will say that this trailer has saved me $20 because based entirely on this trailer, I will not be planning to see the film in theaters.

The rest of this review will contain spoilers from the trailer, which I can only assume are ACT 3 SPOILERS from the film . . .

I mean, the spoilers shown in 2:06 on might be Amazing Spider-Man 2 LAST SCENE OF THE MOVIE LEVELS OF SPOILER. I.E. I CANNOT BELIEVE THEY DID THAT. 

So yeah, spoilers from here on.

SPOILER  SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER

"Man won't kill God. The Devil will do it." 
It's been a rumor for a while now, (since we saw the actor playing Zod on the cast again and saw his corpse in the body bag of the last trailer) that Luthor was going to use Zod to create Doomsday. I'm really not upset about the fact that Doomsday is the bad guy, so much as I am upset about the fact that the movie is not Batman v Superman; it's Batman and Superman fight for 20 minutes and then work it out. Even if that's what the movie was originally designed to be, don't reveal that in the trailer. You don't need to reveal that in the trailer. Why do we need to see that? 

Also, what the hell kind of shield can protect against an explosion of that magnitude? I understand that they're going to be using magic with Wonder Woman, but it's still a shield. Does it create a force field? How is Batman alive? The way the scene is cut, it looks completely absurd. 

And that "joke", can we call it that? That, "I thought she was with you" nonsense in Bat-voice? Ugh. Simply, ugh. There was a big deal earlier in the year when it was revealed that DC had a memo saying they wouldn't be making jokes or doing light-hearted stuff in their movies. Apparently, that is because they are completely incompetent at it. 

I don't even want to interact with the DC fanatics over the course of the next few days because I can't understand how anyone can watch that trailer and be happy about having the movie totally spoiled. Now it's just going to be a matter of watching the cool things in the movie, and the first two acts will have no impetus or drama. 

Dammit, I wanted that Dark Knight Returns moment on screen, and it looks like we're just going to get Superman winning, and then Luthor unleashing Doomsday. What on earth?

And you know, maybe we will get that scene in this movie. They have that, "It's time for you to learn what it means to be a man" line in the movie, but why couldn't this movie be about Batman versus Superman? Not, Batman & Superman & Wonder Woman versus Doomsday.

I just don't get it. And Doomsday looks like a putz. The CG Doomsday looks really out-of-place. In Warcraft, the CG was noticeable and not as good as the CG in BvS, but there it looked like a stylistic choice; here it looks like a limitation of technology.

I'm not going to rewatch the trailer to try to analyze it. It makes me unhappy. I was hopeful that this movie wouldn't suck, but that seems farther and farther away now. I'm still hopeful, but I'm probably not going to be watching it in theaters now. Thanks for saving me the $20.

Have you seen it? What did you think? Do you think that the reveal was a major spoiler? What did you think of that joke line? Tell me what you think below. Thanks for reading.